“If your sad cause your single today REALIZE you were single yesterday and will be single tomorrow because of the EXACT sad, lonely unworthy feeling you have right now! YOU have to feel GOOD about love, feel GOOD about life and most importantly, feel GOOD about YOURSELF in order for someone to feel good about LOVING YOU!  Take a minute, STOP telling everybody else Happy V-Day, go look in the mirror and say ‘I LOVE YOU!’ (Single or not)  Do it now and tell me how it feels…..”

~ Shanel Cooper-Sykes


When I saw this on Facebook today, I felt compelled to share it and add my own little two cents.  This isn’t meant to try to delve too deep into the inner workings or meaning behind what love is and all that; that’s a conversation for another day.  These are just my thoughts, something I was feeling today…..

Loving yourself is the key to starting any healthy relationship.  All morning I witnessed a handful of my friends, albeit in a joking manner, post things about how Valentine’s Day sucks or how lonely they are or about this, that and the third.  There might be someone saying right now, “Bone, it’s not that serious”, but for somebody out there it is.  It may not be how you’re feeling at this very moment, but I’m quite certain that at some point in your existence that you or someone who you know has felt similarly; that feeling of worthlessness, being undesirable, etc.

Well let me tell you a little something friend, you are none of those things.  You are every bit as worthy to be loved as anybody else in this world.  If you’re single, don’t think of it as a lonely time, think of it as having more time to getting to know and loving yourself.  The more you love yourself, the more attractive you will appear to other people.  Let me be a little more specific, when I say to love yourself, I don’t mean in a superficial or shallow sense.  I don’t mean getting your hair and nails done, wearing scantily clad clothing, bragging about the size of your Johnson, getting all dolled up, throwing on designer gear, trying to hit the gym to sculpt that six pack, or talking about how many partners you’ve had, etc.  That’s all fine and dandy, but that’s not who YOU are, those are not the makings of you.  Too many times people are defined by their exterior appearance, hell, that’s all people seem to care about these days (not everybody though).

You have to be willing and able to look beyond the surface.  That’s where the truth exists.  It begins in your thoughts; how you view the world and how you allow other things to affect your view of the world, to include yourself.  If you’re one of these people that goes through life measuring your level of success or your desire for things based on what other people are doing or what other people have, then I would strongly recommend that you stop it.  That is a very dangerous and toxic way of thinking.  You have to gauge things based on your own levels and abilities.  This is just one way, I can think of about 20 different ways to get on track, but I will save that for another day.

Just try this out for a few days or a few weeks when you wake up to start your day.  Don’t just jump out of bed, take a few moments and lay in bed.  Take a few deep breaths, collect yourself, and be truly thankful for being able to open your eyes.  As you slowly rise out of the bed, be thankful that you are able to pick your body up.  As you walk into the bathroom to handle your business, be thankful that everything is working.  As you walk pass that mirror, look at yourself and tell yourself that you love who you are, the good, the bad and the indifferent.  Feel that love emanate from your being and go about the rest of your day.  The more you continue to love yourself for who you truly are and not who you want the world to think you are, things will begin to click in your life.  You’ll have a renewed sense of self and be able to tackle anything that comes your way.  Even if you have a sense of who you are, it doesn’t hurt to remind yourself every now and again.  Be blessed, be free and to thine own self be true.

I’ll still luv ya tomorrow…..


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