Hello, my name is….


“Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact. Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth.” ~ Marcus Aurelius

Allow me to reintroduce myself….  My name is Bone…

Okay, I wasn’t born Bone, Jimbone, Bonebody, Bonebidness; those are different personalities that I have taken on over the years (side note: I am not schizophrenic nor do I suffer from any multiple personality disorders, just ask one of them and they’ll tell you).

Actually I was born Jamie Rejean Gadson.  That’s the name my mother originally gave me [Big shout to Viola Gadson-Brown, wouldn’t have made it without you].  I reentered this realm on 1 May 1980 at approximately 10:28PM.  Don’t remember much about being an infant or a toddler, but who really does?  I mean, there are some folk who recall such memories and I am happy for anybody that can; that was the purest time of our physical manifestation; wide open and unadulterated.  Anyway, that’s a story for a different day….

I remember growing up in the Bronx.  I was a happy go lucky kid.  I had a rather vivid imagination; always had a knack for creating images and translating them into words.  Contrary to popular belief, I was rather shy and timid coming up.  I was never really part of the in-crowd or “that dude” but I had a decent amount of “friends” (when I was younger, almost everybody I came in contact with or chilled with on a regular basis was considered a friend, but as I got older, I began to learn that a lot of them were just acquaintances or associations of convenience #jusmythoughts).

Hell, I was a nerd.  Stayed on the honor roll, was always recommended for the “gifted” programs and what not.  I wasn’t fly and flashy, didn’t garner much attention nor did I really care, but at some point, I guess when puberty hit, all that changed.  I was very much self conscious.  I didn’t think too highly of myself, but the world never knew.  So enter the dawning of the Bone Age.  I started feeling myself a little bit, had a renewed confidence, had a little swag.  But all of that was a cover up to what was going on inside of my being.  I believe that this is the memory that is ingrained in the minds of many people that I have befriended in my younger years; high school, cut parties, hanging out on the block, getting into “beefs” with other neighborhoods, etc….

Let’s fast forward a bit, I graduated high school in 1998 and left to serve in the U.S. Army.  Lost contact with quite a few people.  I met some extraordinary people while serving in the Army.  Developed a new sense of self; reinvented myself in so many ways.  Gone were the many feelings of self-loathsomeness, inadequacy, and awkwardness that I had experienced as a youth.  This is not to say that I didn’t experience some very depressing times or that everything was straight as an adult now, but I am a totally different person than I once was.  Much of what I experienced was done on my own, meaning that I didn’t have too many people in my circle.  There was no Facebook or MySpace during much of my young adult life and honestly, looking back, my life was so much better without it.

“And it’s my opinion, and that’s only my opinion, that you are a lunatic. Just because there are a few hundred other people sharing your lunacy with you does not make you any saner.  Doomed, eh?” ~ Oleg Kiselev

I say all of that to say this:  There are a few individuals out there that think they know who I am or feel like they know how I get down.  Some may speak their minds to me directly, while others take the third party approach.  Either way if that’s how you choose to get down, then by all means, continue to live your lives in said fashion.  However, don’t get it twisted, I got along almost a decade without contacting a whole lot of people and frankly I can go the rest of my existence not saying another word to anybody else.  What people knew about me in the past is in the past.  I’m not that same individual that used to run behind my older brother, or that used to have cats in my crib while my moms and pops was at work, cutting hair, setting up the turntables, rapping and wilding out.  Not the same cat that used to rock the Reebok classics and the Nike Cortez with his Old Navy overalls, bumping to the CD player on the BX22 on my way to school.  I’m not anything or anybody you think I am.  If you think you know who I am, you have absolutely no idea.

A lot of you knew me as a child, but have no idea of the things that I have gone through to make me the adult that I am and continue to mold myself into being.  People have developed an image or opinion of what they believe to be true and hey, by all merits you are entitled to that.  However, don’t place all your faith in thinking you know it all because you’ll end up looking like a fool in the end.  I’m quite certain that many of the people I associate with can relate.  It’s time to stop acting crazy and grow up; time to put things into a better perspective and get your lives together.  If upon reading this, you take it personally or feel some kind of way, good.  If you can relate to what I am saying or know of people that need to hear these words or you just want to tell people about themselves then do that.  Share this link, hell, steal this blog, replace my story with yours and repost it if you must.  And while you’re at it listen to a couple of tracks that are relevant to what I am saying: “Cut You Off” by Kendrick Lamar and “No Idea” by Joe Budden.

I’m confident that after listening to those tracks and reading this blog for what it is, you’ll be compelled to make some changes in your life or choose to cut me off, either way, I’ll still luv ya tomorrow…..

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2 comments

  1. Viola Gadson-Brown

    Son,
    You inspire me. You make me feel so grateful to my God for giving me the privilege of birthing you into this world. My heart is so full of love for you. I too have not always felt worthy, but reading your words have given a pause to re-examine my life and put all that have taken place in my life in proper perspective. Thank you!
    Please WRITE THE BOOK already!!!!!

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